(post copyright 2015, Dawn Weber)
It's time to pack up the flip-flops,
It's time to pack up the smile,
Winter is well on its way,
Yet I'm in complete denial.
I get like this in October,
When the forecast turns to shit,
'Cause I don't want to pack up my flip-flops,
No sir. Not one little bit.
But six months of ice and snow,
Don't make for flip-flop weather,
From fall till the end of March,
You want your feet in leather.
It's time to dig out my boots,
I really hate to admit it,
I'll also unpack my pants,
And hope to hell they still fit.
That's one reason I love flip-flops,
They're never too tight or snug,
Even after a week's vacation,
They feel like a gentle foot-hug.
Yeah, flip-flops are like a party,
Right there on my feet,
With a look that yells, "Margaritas!"
And a vibe that shouts, "Let's eat!"
Oh sing a song of the flip-flop,
They're cheap, they're fast, they're easy,
Much like your average prostitute,
Only wearable, flat and disease-free.
All the world loves a flip-flop,
Manufactured by kids in China,
For sale at every Dollar Tree,
From Maine to Texarkana.
Still, it's time to lose the flip-flops,
Oh how I will miss them,
My toes will count the days,
Till they return to freedom.
Yes it's time to pack up the flip-flops,
I can't deny that it's winter,
But things aren't really all bad 'cause,
I am also packing my razor.
hair does not hibernate
ReplyDeleteMine does.
DeleteFor me it's having to stop wearing shorts and switch back to pants. I hate pants. I have never been able to wear flip flops. That piece b/t the toes hurts so much. My friends are all, 'you'll get used to it', but I'm unwilling to endure pain on a long term basis in the hope I get used to it.
ReplyDeletePants are wayyyy overrated!
DeleteWaaah! I miss my flip-flops, too. Sheepskin slippers are a comfy enough replacement indoors, but you tend to get funny looks if you wear them to the grocery store.
ReplyDeleteIs that why people stare at me at Kroger?
DeleteNo, I refuse! I'm thinking of making flip flop weather covers. They'd snap to the sides and zip up the front, could even be fleece lined leather, for snow days, or rain covers for warm but wet days. You could change out the covers but not the flip flops! I better clorox mine. I do want them disease free. You are hysterical!
ReplyDeleteLove your idea, Strayer! I'd buy your flip flop covers!
DeleteFor me it's my favourite slip on sandals (arches don't like flip flops anymore, boo). I wear those things until I get frostbite in my big toes.
ReplyDeleteI am also mourning my sandals, Jenny, so I totally understand.
DeleteWe call them thongs here - and are just entering the thong season. Some of us, like me, never really left it.
ReplyDeleteGrowing up in Youngstown, Ohio, we called them thongs, too. Things have such a different meaning nowadays, though...
DeleteThat's a great poem. We can wear flip-flops throughout most of the winter in Florida.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Janie
And that is why I will be moving down there in t minus 5 years. No lie.
DeleteI'm thinking you could wear them longer with some wool socks. You know, the kind with the split for your toes. You could maybe get an extra month at each end of the season. You'd be a fashion trend-setter. Maybe.
ReplyDeleteI have seen this fashion forward look of which you speak.
DeleteOn old men.
In Florida.
Yay! Blogger is finally letting me comment. For some reason I could see the comments, just not add any of my own. WTF???
DeleteMy other half is sort of in a mess with me and my shoe selections. It's either brown flip flops, black flip flops, white flip flops, tan flip flops or navy blue flip flops. One of them matches something else I own so I always look good. I only trade the flip flops in for boots when the weather turns. Again, Black, brown, tan, white or navy. What else do I need? Oh, right. Those big, muck boots for scuffing around in the swampy yard. It's those or Wellies. Neither of which he likes much. His problem, not mine.